If there is one thing I hear more often than almost anything else before a photography session, it is some variation of, “I’m just really awkward in pictures.”

Maybe you never know what to do with your hands. Maybe the second a camera is pointed in your direction, you suddenly forget how to stand like a normal human being. (I totally do!) Maybe you feel like your smile looks forced, or you worry that you are going to look uncomfortable in every single photograph.

And if you are a parent, there is a good chance you have an entirely different problem: you are so used to being the one behind the camera that the idea of actually stepping in front of it feels strange.

The good news?

You do not have to know how to pose.

You don’t have to be naturally photogenic. You don’t have to know what to do with your hands. And you certainly don’t have to show up to your session already knowing how to look effortless in front of a camera.

That is what your photographer is there for.

The photographs that feel the most natural are rarely the result of simply telling someone to “act natural.” In fact, that might be one of the least helpful directions you can give someone who already feels uncomfortable being photographed. Instead, creating natural photographs is about guidance, movement, connection, and giving people permission to simply be themselves.

So, stop thinking about posing.

When most people hear the word posing, they imagine being told exactly where to stand, where to put their hands, which direction to look, and when to smile. There is certainly a place for traditional posing, but beautiful photographs do not have to feel stiff or overly constructed. Some of my favorite images happen when people are doing something instead of simply standing still.

Walk together.

Hold hands.

Fix your child’s hair.

Whisper something ridiculous into your partner’s ear.

Pick up your little one.

Let your kids run ahead of you.

Lean into each other.

These small actions give your body something natural to do, which takes away some of the pressure of being photographed. Instead of thinking about what you look like, you are focused on what you are doing.

And suddenly, the photograph feels less like a photograph — It feels like a moment.

Movement makes all the difference in a photo, there is something inherently beautiful about it.

A dress moving in the breeze. A child running toward their parents. Someone laughing and turning their head away from the camera. A couple walking hand-in-hand. A little one reaching up to be held. Movement creates opportunities for genuine expressions and interactions that cannot always be recreated by simply asking everyone to smile. That does not mean every photograph needs to involve running through a field or spinning around dramatically. Sometimes movement is incredibly subtle.

A small shift of your weight.

A gentle sway.

Walking a few steps.

Brushing a strand of hair away from someone’s face.

Pulling your child a little closer.

Those little movements keep your body relaxed and help prevent the dreaded “I have no idea what to do with myself” feeling.

Want another pro tip? Give yourself something to think about.

One of the hardest things about having your photograph taken is knowing that you are being watched. You suddenly become aware of your hands. Your smile. Your posture. Your hair. The way you are standing. And the more you think about those things, the less natural you feel. Instead of asking you to simply smile at the camera, I can give you something else to focus on.

Ask your partner what their favorite thing about you is.

Tell your child to whisper their silliest joke in your ear.

Have everyone walk toward the camera while talking about what they want for dinner.

Ask a parent to tell their child a story.

Have siblings race to see who can reach their parents first.

The goal is not to manufacture a perfect moment.

The goal is to create an environment where you can forget, even for a few seconds, that a camera is there. Those are often the seconds when the magic happens.

Connection Will Always Matter More Than Perfection

I think we have become accustomed to seeing photographs where everything is perfectly arranged.

Perfect outfits. Perfect smiles. Perfect hair. Perfect poses.

But when you look at photos years from now, perfection probably will not be the thing you remember.

You will remember the way your daughter used to throw her head back when she laughed. The way your son always wanted to be carried even though he was getting too big, the way your husband looked at you when he thought you weren’t paying attention. The tiny hand wrapped around your finger, the way everyone squeezed together because there was never quite enough room on the blanket.

Those things are imperfect.

And they are exactly what makes them worth remembering.

When I photograph families, I want to preserve more than what everyone looked like on a particular afternoon. I want to preserve what it felt like to be together.

That means sometimes the best photograph is not the one where everyone is looking at the camera. Sometimes it is the photograph immediately before everyone looks at the camera. Or the one immediately after. Or maybe the one where everyone is laughing because someone completely broke character.

Those are the photographs that tend to become favorites.

And if you still feel awkward, you’re not alone!

Please know this before your session:

You are not the only person who feels awkward in front of a camera. Most people do.

Even the people you see in photographs who look effortlessly comfortable probably had no idea what to do with themselves five minutes earlier. Being comfortable in front of a camera is not something everyone is born knowing how to do. It is something that happens when you are given enough direction and enough time to stop thinking about the camera.

You do not need to show up knowing how to pose, you just need to show up!

Your photographer can take care of the rest.

This next one is very important… Let your kids be kids!

Children have absolutely no interest in maintaining a perfect pose for an extended period of time—and honestly, I don’t blame them. Trying to force a child to sit perfectly still, smile perfectly, and look at the camera for an entire session can turn what should be a fun experience into a stressful one.

Instead, let them move.

Let them explore. Let them laugh. Let them be silly! And definitely let them take breaks.

Some of the most meaningful photographs of childhood happen in the moments when children are simply being themselves.

And yes, sometimes that means a little chaos. But that chaos is part of childhood, too.

Years from now, you may look back at a photograph and laugh because you remember exactly how your child was at that age—the way they never stopped moving, the way they wanted to run everywhere, or the way they absolutely refused to cooperate for the first fifteen minutes.

Those memories are worth documenting.

Here’s another thing: Couples don’t have to know how to look romantic.

Another common concern I hear is, “We’re just not good at couples pictures.”

You don’t have to be. You don’t need to know how to pose romantically or recreate something you’ve seen on Pinterest.

You just need to interact with the person you love.

Hold their hand, walk together.

Put your arms around each other.

Tell them something that makes them laugh.

Rest your head against their shoulder.

Look at each other.

And if you feel ridiculous doing any of it?

Laugh about it!

That genuine laughter will always photograph better than trying desperately to look like the perfectly posed couple you saw online.

And last — but certainly not least. Trust your photographer.

Ultimately, making photographs feel natural is a collaboration. Your photographer’s job is not simply to stand behind a camera and tell you to smile.

It is to pay attention.

To notice when your child reaches for your hand.

To see the way you look at your partner.

To recognize when a moment is unfolding and give you enough space for it to happen.

It is to know when to guide you and when to step back.

There is a balance between creating beautiful compositions and allowing real moments to unfold naturally. A good photographer knows when to do each.

And that is why you do not have to arrive at your session already knowing what you are doing.

You can trust that you will be guided.

You can laugh when something feels awkward.

You can move.

You can take a breath.

You can be yourself.

At the end of the day, the photographs I love most are often the ones that don’t feel overly photographed.

They feel like memories. They feel like a warm afternoon spent with your family. They feel like your child running into your arms. They feel like the way your partner makes you laugh. They feel like the tiny moments you didn’t realize anyone was paying attention to.

And that is what I want your photographs to feel like.

You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to be photogenic. You don’t have to know how to pose.

You just have to show up and be present with the people you love.

I’ll take care of the rest.

Because someday, you won’t care whether your hair was perfectly in place or whether you knew exactly where to put your hands.

You’ll care that you have the photograph, you’ll care that you can still see the way your little one looked at you, and you’ll care that you can remember how it felt to have everyone together, exactly as you were in that season of your life.

And those are the photographs worth taking.